Tis the season of overindulging, which means it's also the season of guilt, self loathing, and extreme, strict promises come January 1st. Guys, knock this shit off. IT. NEVER. WORKS.
When we set goals for ourselves based on guilt, they are negatively driven and practically gives us the excuse to binge for the next 2 months. If you work out or eat right based on the previous day/week/month's caloric intake, you're doing it all wrong. Instead of setting unrealistic, unsustainable goals for your new year, try tweaking your resolutions to set yourself up for success.
Instead of joining a gym and telling yourself you'll be there 3-5 times per week, ask yourself what your goals are. Do you want to become stronger? If so, change your mindset from "being in the gym x amount of times" to "being about to lift x amount of weight". This way, you eliminate room for that guilty conscious to creep in and make you feel bad about only making it there twice this week. If you showed up, put weight on the bar, and worked toward your goal, you are winning. There is no strict time frame, no scale to step on, no extreme pressure to get there so many times...just a simple goal to do more at a pace that works for you. And, the great thing about a goal like this is that once it's met, it'll be self motivational to set the next one. Before you know it, your initial lifting goal will become your warm up - or at least feel much easier.
Instead of signing up for a yoga class package, set a goal of being more flexible. Perhaps pick a pose you've always wanted to conquer and practice until you get there. Again, no time frame, no "have to's" or "shoulds" - just the ability to move your body and watch your own practice improve with each time on the mat. If you need to attend a class for motivation, go for it. But if life gets in the way and you don't make it one week, and still find yourself on the mat - even for a few moments - you're still kicking your resolution's ass.
Instead of "giving up" a food group, alcohol, sweets, carbs (you name it) - try incorporating more healthy foods beforehand. Typically when people go cold turkey on things they over indulge in, it leads to a binge down the road. You can feel better about having these foods if they follow a few fruits and veggies, healthy snack or well rounded meal; and, if you feel better about your previous choices, you will be less likely to over do it with the other stuff. Eat the bread, drink the wine, have the chocolate, just be mindful when you do. This allows you to be put on a road to a healthier you without any major restrictions. (Not to mention, if you know you're not going cold turkey come January 1st, it may prevent you from having that 3rd piece of pie because, in your mind, it's no longer justified).
The biggest thing we all can do is (say it with me now) STOP. COMPARING. OURSELVES. TO OTHERS. Guys. We are not our friends, our family, the Instagram Gymsharks, or anyone else we try to be "more like". Being successful in your own life with your own goals is to set them solely for yourself. If you want to lose weight but hate the gym, DON'T JOIN A GYM. Walk, jog, have a dance party with your kids, challenge your spouse to a sit-up challenge...whatever works for you will be where you find your success. If you want to eat better but hate salads, DON'T EAT THE FREAKING SALAD. Mix the healthy foods you do enjoy together and discover your own weird concoction of health foods. Need an exercise class to get moving but Marsha over there is self motivated? Get your ass to class.
Meditation and self love and all that hippy shit is great, but let's be real, most people's New Year's Resolutions are a little more body-based and a little less "let me align my chakras". Here's how you can help with that through your holiday season and into the new year: you must love your body, but you must also be flexible about what it looks like - a quote from female health expert Stefani Ruper. If drinking the eggnog and having seconds on stuffing is what makes your holiday season nostalgic for you, then go for it. However, your homework comes the next morning when you have the choice to feel bad about your holiday treats, or wake up feeling nourished with comfort foods knowing you fully enjoyed them. It's okay to love your body both when it's bloated from salty, tasty foods and also when you're feeling your best after a week of solid work outs and health foods. Both times, they are still you and yours and one doesn't deserve to be loved less than the other.
I challenge you to take your 2021 resolutions E A S Y. Set goals, not restrictions. It's okay to simply plan to move a little more and eat a little better, and keep on adding to that as you see fit. Please don't eliminate your favorite food or put yourself through a wild work out after having it. 2020 has been a shit show enough without planning to torture ourselves come January, especially if those torture plans are signing you up for failure. We all need to feel better in these crazy times, so be sure you're doing what is best for you. And hey, if you want to align your chakras while you're on this path, well, then that's just dandy.
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