Life Interrupts

"Life interrupts" - Just think about it. How many times have things not gone according to plan? Or worse, how many moments have you missed because you stuck with the plan, waving away any interruptions? Once I stumbled upon these two little words, I realized just how much stress I created for myself by becoming frustrated with life's interruptions instead of opening up to them.

Most of you know how much I love my mornings. Pajamas on, coffee hot, book or tablet in hand - it's my time. I wake up early every day regardless of work or exercise simply to treat myself to this peace. However, there are days that I will be tapping away on the keyboard or have my nose buried in an enjoyable chapter, totally engulfed in this quiet time, when I hear the soft footsteps of an eye-rubbing, bed-headed Hannah sneaking down the hallway. I would immediately feel frustrated. Thoughts would emerge like "seriously?? Come on! This is the only time I get to myself all day!" I know she wont fall back asleep, but I tell her it's too early and send her back to bed anyway. Then, naturally after being interrupted, I lose my writing flow or my reading roll, leaving me feeling even more annoyed. Neither one of us was left feeling happy in this scenario, and this teeny cuddly thing will only be little and want to cuddle with me for so long. "Life interrupts" I told myself the next time she graced me with her early bird presence. The book closed, the tablet was placed aside, and I chose to accept this interruption and make it enjoyable. Instead of losing 20 minutes of "mommy time" before exercise or the rest of the house waking, I gained 20 minutes of Hannah snuggles, stories, and smiles. Not to mention the look on her face when I invited her to join me and my fuzzy blanket on the couch instead of sending her back to bed. I embraced the interruption - that's life.

A quote that piggy backs this concept perfectly: "There is very little we can actually resolve; instead, the way to have a greater love of life and to become happier, or at last less neurotic, is to increase our capacity for conflict and to increase our capacity for complexity" (Freud) - Now there's a thought I never stopped to have. I was always focused on simplifying in order to create more time for things that made my life rich, but never did I contemplate adding more space for things to go wrong. Life interrupts, yes, but if we don't allow the space for those interruptions, we could never work with them. I've found that I like to think negatively in a positive light; I allow the wiggle room for the unexpected and potential disappointments simply by reminding myself that they could happen. Or even the simple reminder that kids will be kids, fully equipped with sibling arguments, meltdowns, whiny requests, and complaints. Once that "this will be perfect" image of my day is out of my head, I can accept the day for what it is, and what it always will be is interrupted.

Once I started surrendering myself to these interruptions, I realized just how many moments of my day I was missing in my attempt to stick to the plan - another life lesson in letting go, which I'm finding is and will be never ending. Little things, like when my husband comes over to me when I'm doing the dishes, simply to place his hands on my hips and kiss me; instead of putting the sponge down, turning around and surrendering to this sweet marital moment, I would feel aggravated that my chore was being interrupted. I'd give a half-assed smile, and wouldn't skip a beat at the sink. Now, my little mantra of "life interrupts" has brought many more of these moments into my life because I am able to be in it. Or, another example, when my oldest daughter comes into my room after bedtime to tell me a story from school she forgot to share earlier. Very rarely did I actively listen; I found myself more focused on sending her back to bed than taking this small interruption as an extra moment to share with my girl. Mantra time. I started listening.

My life has improved in so many ways through the inspiration of those two little words. By allowing life to interrupt me, I found a way to be less annoyed, a more attentive mother and wife, and more accepting of the daily chaos. Instead of strictly carving out time for myself and my happiness, I cut into it to leave more room for conflict. Nothing is perfect, nothing is under control - just the way it's supposed to be.